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Coping With Infertility Grief While Using Donor Eggs

No matter how long you have been trying for a baby, learning that your egg quality or quantity may prevent you from using your eggs can understandably bring several emotions.

Although assisted reproductive technology (ART) still gives you a viable path to parenthood, infertility grief at the inability to use your own eggs is normal.

Understanding how to address this grief is crucial for helping you prepare for the lifelong journey of parenthood that awaits you.

Get in touch with us online to get connected to resources you can utilize to address whatever emotions you are feeling.

In this article, grief and infertility within the context of using donor eggs to become a parent will be broken down and it will end with tangible strategies you can use to address these emotions.

What Is Infertility Grief?

If you or your partner is experiencing emotional pain and mourning as a result of infertility, you may be experiencing infertility grief.

Parenthood may have been something you have been dreaming about since you were a child. Maybe it only recently came into the picture.

No matter how long it has been, learning that you may need donor eggs to make it possible can result in feeling various emotions such as:

Although parenthood is still a possibility, you could feel sad about not being able to be pregnant and experience what pregnancy is like.

Losing the opportunity to create a child naturally may result in feeling like it’s been taken from you. 

Whether it’s learning about it soon after deciding to grow your family or down the road, it could feel like everything is working against you becoming a parent.

Many others who use donor eggs to help grow their family but you may feel like those around you don’t understand what it feels like to be going what you are going through.

With the evolution of technology and assisted reproductive technology (ART) specifically, it’s more possible than ever to still become a parent but the journey to the destination looks different.

If you’re struggling to understand the reasons behind your infertility, explore our article “Why Can’t I Carry a Baby?” for insights into potential causes and next steps.

Does Infertility Grief Ever Go Away?

It truly depends on the circumstances of your situation and how you manage it. Whether it eventually goes away or not, how you manage it over time can make it something that you can navigate rather than affecting you negatively over a long term-period.

Coping with Infertility Grief While Using an Egg Donor

When you are working through your infertility grief, you may be wondering if becoming a parent is still even a possibility.

Using an egg donor with in-vitro fertilization (IVF) is a form of ART that keeps the door to parenthood open for you if you or your partner:

Coming to terms with the fact that you may need to use ART to help grow your family is a sign that you’re coping with infertility grief by trying to find ways to make it possible.

That grief still may exist even if you decide using an egg donor is right for your circumstances but that doesn’t mean you’ll always feel that way.

No two journeys to parenthood look the same and this could be your opportunity.

How to Deal with Infertility Grief [5 Tips]

There’s no quick fix to overcoming grief and infertility. Everyone processes it in their own way and the methodology and timeline can look different for each person.

But there are some general strategies you can try to address the grief and other emotions you may be feeling such as:

Acknowledge your feelings. If you need to let off steam about this difficult process by crying, do so. If you want to yell into a pillow to get out some of your anger, try it out. 

What you may be feeling could be similar or different from what your partner is experiencing. Everyone processes their emotions differently and you and your partner can work through your different emotions together.

Fertility counselors are prime example of getting an outside perspective to a problem that has affected many people from all walks of life.

Hearing stories from others that have experienced similar situations can help remove some of the false feelings that you are all alone in this journey. Learning about others and their outcomes can help buoy your confidence that parenthood is still possible for you.

Talk to your friends and family about your journey and share how they can help you address some of what’s affecting you the most.

If you are looking for specifics, like professionals or support groups that can help address your infertility grief, here are some options you can research:

Contact us online to get the support you deserve. Whether it’s for addressing the emotions you’re feeling or getting connected to the necessary mental health resources you need, we’re here for you.

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